Hello again FF’s. I told you I would be back and here I am. So, what am I on grumbling about now you say…. hint, there is a bit of a clue in the title, drum roll…..well, it’s the dilemma of wedding guest attire.
I have been cordially invited to a wedding, which is now just over 2 weeks away. When it was 10 weeks away, I promised myself I would lose 10lbs, now with the wedding looming, I need to lose 12lbs!!! Now, my arithmetical skills may be about 50 years old, but even I can fathom out I have put on 2lbs in that time, which isn’t a lot, however, it isn’t what was meant to happen!!!!!!!!!!!!! Who shovelled that food down my big gob???? Anyway, apart from the weight issue, I have to say, I have never been that keen on the dress I bought some months ago, even less keen now that it is sooooo bloody tight – thunder thighs and huge belly (last night I was online looking for best tummy/thigh holders knickers/shorts/bodysuit to help eradicate this problem, in the absence of immediate liposuction).
Now, said dress was from a choice of about 10 I had ordered, (CHOSEN MAINLY BECAUSE IT WAS THE BEST OF A BAD BUNCH AND FITTED, ALMOST, AT THE TIME). I have also bought 3 pairs of shoes, 2 bags, 2 pairs of earrings, a bracelet and a shawl, to match said dress, (yet to get hair accessory – note… it will not be, absolutely not a chance in hell, of it being a fascinator. Having seen some of those daft bints at ASCOT wearing, what, can only be described as LAMPSHADES or dead animals on their heads, no siree, not for this fashionista, those particular ‘accessories’ give me the FEAR).
So,here’s the thing, as some form of masochism, it must have been, I decided yesterday morning, (best time to weigh yourself or try anything on) to try said dress on…….. AND…… DANGER, DANGER- Mad Menopausal woman on the RAMPAGE!!!! Resulting in, not the best start to my weekend, for all concerned. Now, if you are all lumps and bumps this early in the morning, bare in mind, this is before I have even had anything to eat, what chance have you got? Said dress was promptly removed, nearly ripping in the process, (as it has no zips and I could barely get it over my THUNDER THIGHS), I grabbed my bellies up off the floor, ran to my room and hastily fired up the laptop, no sooner was I online than another 5 outfits were in ‘my basket’ and purchased, these purchases will arrive today (if they know what’s good for them)…. so my FF’s, you have been warned, be prepared for another onslaught from me tomorrow, you may want to avoid going online!!!
Now, what is the point to my rant you ask? Is it just about ME going on about my weight AGAIN????. Well, kinda but actually, no, it really isn’t. My real issue and point of rant is…… weddings, I don’t like them, they are too peopley plus it’s very stressful being a guest. I mean what on earth do you wear????????????? It’s way too difficult, especially if you are me, I can dress everyone else, but ME, OVERTHINK, OVERTHINK,OVERTHINK – BRAIN MELTDOWN!
As a guest, where do you draw the line? Yes, it’s a time for getting dressed up and celebrating loved ones (or even someone you might vaguely know, who has just invited you to make up the numbers and get a gift), BIG DAY, but not at the expense of looking and feeling like a dog’s dinner or……. as if you are going to a DAY AT THE RACES. The best way to look good in these situations, is if you feel good in yourself. Don’t feel you have to go overboard and be someone who bears no resemblance to the ‘real’ you, buying what are now labelled in stores as ‘Wedding Guest’ outfits, with price tags to match, going all out and getting hair, nails and make up done, making you look like one of those 5 year old American beauty pageant girls, who look about 40!!!. Just do you, only a more dressed up version and one you feel good in.
Labelled as WEDDING GUEST attire…… these are all from Karen Millen. Some are wearable after the event but most end up on VINTED as ‘worn once’.
DOING YOU …….these are all from ASOS (can be worn to a wedding or wherever your heart desires)
So FF’s, for future reference, if you are ever crazy, kind enough to invite me to your wedding, please give me at least 2 years notice, this will (hopefully) allow me to deal with the stress leading up to it (WHAT?? It’s not only the bride’s DAY!!), or alternatively, invite someone else who has less body issues/menopausal madness. xx
ValApparel 